Last week I traveled to Cincinnati, Ohio, to attend the 2018 National Society of Newspaper Columnists Conference. I always look forward to this annual gathering of the tribe, but this year’s event in Cincinnati held a special attraction for me because someone I once believed would play a significant role in my life lived in the area and would be attending our group’s luncheon. Years ago it seemed my future and his might be forever entwined, but, alas, our paths had diverged and we ended up in different worlds.
As I sat with my eyes fixed on the entrance to the dining room, a million fears flooded my mind. Would he be happy to see me? Would it be awkward? Would he wonder why I hadn’t yet sprung for one of those Lifestyle Face Lifts? And then, suddenly, all my fears vanished because there he was, his presence filling the doorway, as handsome and imposing as I’d pictured.
I watched as he made his way through the eager crowd, easily chatting with folks along the way, confirming his charm was still fully intact. When he arrived at my table, my heart was nearly thumping out of my chest. I took a deep breath, rose to my feet and grabbed hold of the hand he extended to me. The veteran newsman and hometown hero certainly needed no introduction in this room, yet he smiled warmly and said, “Hello, I’m Nick Clooney. It’s nice to see you here today.”
“Hello, Mr. Clooney,” I gushed. “My name is Lee Gaitan. It’s such a pleasure to meet you, and, and—” I paused a moment before deciding it was best to be direct. “And you probably don’t know this, but I was almost your daughter-in-law.”
There, I’d said it. I’d addressed the elephant in the room. Well, the elephant in my head anyway. My “romance” with George Clooney may have been ancient news, but I felt his father had a right to know how bad I’d always felt for breaking George’s heart, how much I wished it could have ended differently.
You see, back in the ‘90s George had pursued me shamelessly—right through my very own television screen in my very own living room—for two-and-a-half seasons of ER. Every Thursday night, there he was, blinking out Morse-coded messages to me with those soulful, bad-boy eyes. “Blink, blink, bliiiink,” (I love you, Lee), “Blink, blink-blink, bliiiink,” (I need you, Lee). Sometimes it was so blatant, it was embarrassing. Oh, I admit I wiled away many an afternoon, daydreaming about a future with him, fantasizing about being part of the legendary Clooney clan. I even engaged in a little flirtatious blinking back. But, I was married at the time and as strongly as I was tempted, I ultimately changed the channel before we went too far to turn back.
George was crushed and became understandably gun shy about love afterwards. (I mean, look how long it took him to finally commit to marriage. Coincidence? I think not.) I’d always felt I owed the Clooney family an apology for the suffering I’d caused and this was my chance to make things right. The essence of class, the elder Clooney graciously accepted my apology—with a wink that could turn a steel girder to putty, by the way—and even declined to alert security about me.
There was a bittersweet element to our goodbyes after the luncheon, with overly cheery promises to “keep in touch” which we both knew we’d never keep. I turned to look at him one more time as I was leaving the dining room. He was surrounded by admiring fans. To them, he was a distinguished broadcaster, an author, a political activist. But to me, he was, and will always remain, the road not taken. Nick Clooney—my former future father-in-law.
“with a wink that could turn a steel girder to putty, by the way”
That’s some great and hilarious writing.
Thank you so much, Sandy! Wasn’t he just utterly charming and a brilliant speaker?!
I am so sad I didn’t get to meet your former future father-in-law, Lee! He sounds charming indeed, living up to every woman’s dream of a celebrity husband’s father. There is only one little thing I need to address. I was under the impression George delayed his marriage because he was in love with me during the ER years. Anyway, I’m glad you’ve made things right with the Clooney family after all these years. Making amends is good for the soul! 😉
It is just shocking how many women got their signals crossed where George was concerned. But I always knew it was about me. And don’t forget that you’ve had a bump on the head, so your memory is not too clear. Besides you had those THREE cuties fawning over you in the real ER bay–don’t be greedy. 😉
Funny, at the same time Juliana Margulies was hot after me. I finally had to let her down because she was a Conservative Jew and I was Reform. Hope she’s all right.
Well, she seems to be doing okay from all appearances, but I can still see a wistfulness in her eyes, Perry. They fell hard for us, but we can’t feel guilty for being honest with them. 🙂 Thanks so much for writing!
This was a fun read. Good job!
Thanks, Dave! You guys had no idea of the connection I had, ha ha!
And to think I always thought George’s Morse Code blinks were intended for me. My heart is broken. Great piece!!! I love it! I posted it on my FB page.
Oh, Laverne, I understand, but you were deceived. It was SO clearly me! 😉 Thank you so much for sharing! 🙂
That George Clooney was such a tramp back then! I always thought he was flirting with me!! (through the TV of course!)
He was SHAMELESS! Still, I felt bad for breaking his heart the way I did. I’ll let you enjoy your little fantasy that he was flirting with you…because I know the truth. It was all about ME! 😉
Wait! What??!! George was after me, not you. I saw those special winks he would give me. If you haven’t seen it, you should watch the My Next Guest interview that Letterman did with George Clooney. Letterman actually went to his parents’ house and included them in the interview.
All you poor deluded women who thought those winks were about YOU. So sad. I understand, though, and don’t want to destroy your illusion (delusion), so I’ll let it go. let me tell you, after meeting his dad, it is so clear where his charm and twinkling eyes come from. Even at 84, that man was electric! And his mom was delightful.
Lee, I understand. I wouldn’t be surprised if every woman in America thought the same thing… although (eyes cast down modestly), I know who his true love is. Its a secret between George and me that will last through the ages.
Oh, my heart breaks for you, lost in your sad delusion, Laurie. Once again, I will say clearly and plainly, it was ME!!! 😉
You mean that blinking wasn’t for me?😢 (love your writing!)
I am just stunned at how many women were confused (deluded?) and didn’t realize it was ALL ABOUT ME! 😉 Thanks for stopping by, Ellen.